What Up G?

This rant may contain cursing... just a forewarning.

I never have and probably never will consider myself much of a designer. I do the work I'm told to do to the best of my ability, but I don't spend countless hours keeping up on trends, new fonts, programs and that might put me at a disadvantage, but there's just so many other to-do's that my interest holds in higher regard. It was the same way in school. Regardless of the aforementioned excuses above as to why I'm not at a big firm in New York, I do know a little bit. If there is an aspect of design that I'm keen on, it's branding. I like it for a number of reasons that you probably don't care about... always have. And I'm not necessarily saying I know a lot about it, I just lean towards this facet of design.

Earlier this year, Gatorade rebranded their logo and the labeling on the iconic bottle (you know when you're holding a Gatorade vs. a Powerade or other assorted sports drink). I didn't really think much of it. I didn't actually consider it all that necessary other than the fact that their labels were starting to look like video game ads. And if you want to call it "G", fine. It's stupid and gimmicky, but you're trying to introduce this to a increasingly younger crowd who are all about gimmicks... again, whatever. And if you want to put stupid quips in big, bold letters with funky breaks, do as you please. I'm sure it'll all be different five years from now. On a positive note, I do like the size/placement of the "bolt" on the labeling.

The problem comes in when I finish up 21.2 very cold, very wet miles and head to Speedway to pick up the usual quart of choco milk and donuts. I decided that I wanted the regular "G" rather than the watered-down "G2" we had at home. I open the cooler door, look for a minute and grab what I thought was the orange Gatorade. Now that they've let the color of the "juice" do the talking, they should mean what the F they say. So what I thought was orange, was actually some mango, A.M. bullshit. I F'ing hate mango, but was thirsty enough to try and choke it down. Nothing doing. Didn't even like it enough to thwart possible death. So Gatorade, if you want to keep the "G" that's your right, but get rid of that stupid shit in bold type and maybe use it to explain what's in the F'ing bottle since your 1,001 flavor colors inevitably overlap in similarity. And yeah, maybe I could've read the small indistinguishable type above "SH-bolt!INEON" but I didn't.

What I really wanted to post instead of the picture was a super slo mo motion piece of a bullet from a gun I don't own blasting through the gut of this bottle. Lesson learned... and let it be a lesson to you folks at home. Gatorade is the sports drink equivalent to Pepsi... they do stupid stuff with rebranding projects and big, bold type. The only difference is that I'll keep putting "G2" on the grocery list every week. Dammit.